Dead Ringers Transcript (Satire) - LLPG

Message from discussion Dead Ringers Transcript (Satire)
From:  Steve Farr <st...@farr.org>
To:  LLPG <llpg-bs7666@googlegroups.com>
Subject: Dead Ringers Transcript (Satire)
Date: Sat, 12 May 2007 20:02:03 -0000
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The following transcript material is produced here purely for fun, and
without prejudice to any of the named parties featured below. For
copyright notices, etc, please see notes at bottom.

The transcript apparently originates from a programme first aired on
BBC Radio 4 at 08:45 (UK local time) Thursday 10 May 2007. It
apparently features part of an actual recorded telephone conversation
between an officer/member of staff at SBC and a comedy actor alleging
(by way of satirical humour) to be "T Blair of Downing Street".

The transcript follows:-

[Radio show host]
 "...12 minutes to 9:00.
 "Now it's not only the political commentators who are looking back on
the Blair era today. The satirists of course are sharpening their
pens, preparing their reviews. And the Dead Ringers Team have been
preparing a special programme that you can hear soon on Radio 4.
Here's a taste of it...

(Telephone ringing)

[SBC]
 "Hello Sedgefield Borough"

[Dead Ringers]
 "Hello Sedgefield Borough Council?"

[SBC]
 "Yes!"

[Dead Ringers]
 "Hi it's me."

(Canned laughter)

[Dead Ringers]
 "Hmm. Er yah. I erm, was just telephoning really about the job. Erm,
here it is - The Part-time LOCAL LAND AND PROPERTY GAZETTEER
Assistant.

[SBC]
 "Oh right, would you like an application form sending out?

[Dead Ringers]
 "Err um, I was well, just hoping, just to do it really, without all
that bureaucracy.

[SBC]
 "No, I'm afraid you will have to apply just like everybody else.

[Dead Ringers]
 "Good. Well yeh, that's the kind of Britain I've always advocated.
Yeh, well bring it on!

[SBC]
 (Laughs politely)

[Dead Ringers]
 "Bovered! Um...

(Canned laughter)

[Dead Ringers]
 "What exactly is a Part-time LOCAL LAND, PROPERTY GAZETTEER
Assistant?

[SBC]
 "I actually have nooo idea. You'll have to speak to the department. I
mean, I can put you through to Lyn who can explain a bit more about
the job...

[Dead Ringers]
 "Is she there?

[SBC]
 "Erm yeh. If you'll hold on a second I'll have a word with her...

[Dead Ringers]
 "Let's have a word with her

(Pause/Canned laughter)

[SBC]
 "Unfortunately she's on her dinner at the minute - would you like to
call back in half an hour? Or you can go on our web site...

[Dead Ringers]
 "Lyn's on her dinner?

[SBC]
 "Yes.

[Dead Ringers]
 "Oh I think no one is entitled to it more.

(Canned laughter)

[Dead Ringers]
 "I hope it will be a very positive and healthy dinner, and she will
look back on it, and reflect and say - that was nice.

[SBC]
 (Polite laugh)

[Dead Ringers]
 "Erm, what's the money for the, err the job? Do you know what that
is?

[SBC]
 "It's a Scale 4 job, which is =A316,137...

[Dead Ringers]
 "...per hour?

(Canned laughter)

[Dead Ringers]
 "That's pretty good actually. That's a pretty good international
rate. Yeh put me down for that one!

[SBC]
 "Can I take your name and address then please?

[Dead Ringers]
 "Ah well yeh uh. Its Mr T Blair...

[SBC]
 "Yeh...

[Dead Ringers]
 "It's ah, Downing Street...

[SBC]
 "Hey can you say that again please?"

[Dead Ringers]
 "Yep. The address is Downing Street. And the telephone number 020
seven one.

(Canned laughter)

[Dead Ringers]
 "And that's it 'cos we're in the middle...

[Radio show host]
 "And they'll be more to come on that...

(On with the show)

Notes
-----

Background:-

The UK Prime Minister Tony Blair has announced that he will stand down
from office on 27 June 2007. The announcement was made in his speech
to labour party members in his Sedgefield constituency on Thursday, 10
May.

Sedgefield Borough Council recently advertised the post of part-time
LOCAL LAND AND PROPERTY GAZETTEER assistant.

Coincidently, a petition under way, on the Prime Minister's own web-
site "to end the address dispute between Local Government, Royal Mail
and Ordnance Survey" was launched recently in a bid to secure the long
term operation of the LOCAL LAND AND PROPERTY GAZETTEER (LLPG) as
maintained by local authorities. The petition runs until September, by
which time Tony Blair will have left office. Therefore it remains to
be seen whether his successor will take up this challenge, of
defending a key public service in the face of the purely commercial
interests of a privatised monopoly.

Copyright notice, etc:-

The previous transcript was taken with the permission of an
independent news source who wishes to remain anonymous. The transcript
is apparently based upon audio material belonging collectively to:-
The Today Programme, BBC Radio 4 (Room G630, Stage 6, Television
Centre, Wood Lane, London W12 7RJ), Dead Ringers (BBC Radio 4) and
Sedgefield Borough Council (hereafter SBC).

Therefore, anyone wishing to copy or use the transcript material are
advised to contact the above parties in the first place. Anyone
obtaining such permission, is hereby granted further permission to
copy and use this entire posting, complete and without any amendment.

Alternatively you may freely copy/forward the browser link address of
this page. Permission is hereby granted to quote from any non-
transcript parts of this posting on other web-sites or media.

Please note: Google Inc are merely the host service provider of this
forum and can take no responsibility of information posted here by
other parties. Although Google are at liberty to remove this content
at any time, the writer hopes, that in the interests of free speech
and good humour that this shall be allowed to remain.

Links:-

Further information about BBC Radio 4 and the Today programme can be
found at http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/today/

Dead Ringers can be found at http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/comedy/deadringers=
.shtml

Further links to information about LOCAL LAND AND PROPERTY GAZETTEER
can be found within the LLPG Google Group, at http://groups.google.co.uk/gr=
oup/llpg-bs7666

For information in regard to the petition to the Prime Minister,
please go to http://petitions.pm.gov.uk/freeaddresses/

For further information about jobs at Sedgefield Borough Council,
Prime Ministers or indeed anyone for that matter may visit
http://www.sedgefield.gov.uk/ccm/navigation/jobs-and-careers/ . There
you will find lots of useful information, and the telephone number of
a very polite and helpful individual who will do their very best to
help you find what you are looking for.