After years of painstaking research, I have now ascenrtained that the slanderous claim that Pippin was secretly betrothed to Goldberry at the time of the War of the Ring is yet another lie spread by the scoffers and mudslingers! I'm most displeased. Will the calumny never end?
> After years of painstaking research, I have now ascenrtained that the > slanderous claim that Pippin was secretly betrothed to Goldberry at > the time of the War of the Ring is yet another lie spread by the > scoffers and mudslingers! I'm most displeased. Will the calumny never > end?
Who claims such falsehood? Tell me who it was, Master Horus, so that I can not visit his website anymore, so that he will no longer earn money from ads and starve to death.
heng...@swirve.com wrote: > After years of painstaking research, I have now ascenrtained that the > slanderous claim that Pippin was secretly betrothed to Goldberry at > the time of the War of the Ring is yet another lie
Sheer nonsense of course. Pippin was a Took; that is to say, pure Fallowhide. They were "taller and slimmer than the others; they were LOVERS OF TREES...." [emphasis mine]
Now ask yourself where Fimbrethil and the other Entwives really ran off too?
On Oct 31, 7:20 pm, Sean_Q_ <no.s...@no.spam> wrote:
> heng...@swirve.com wrote: > > After years of painstaking research, I have now ascenrtained that the > > slanderous claim that Pippin was secretly betrothed to Goldberry at > > the time of the War of the Ring is yet another lie
> Sheer nonsense of course. Pippin was a Took; that is to say, > pure Fallowhide. They were "taller and slimmer than the others; > they were LOVERS OF TREES...." [emphasis mine]
> Now ask yourself where Fimbrethil and the other Entwives really > ran off too?
If you're right, I think we've found out who is TOLKIEN's authorial self-insertion. (We had previously thought it was Treebeard, because TOLKIEN was probably a tree. A bristlecone pine, to be exact)
<pseudony...@fats.teunc.org> wrote: > On Oct 31, 7:20 pm, Sean_Q_ <no.s...@no.spam> wrote:
> > heng...@swirve.com wrote: > > > After years of painstaking research, I have now ascenrtained that the > > > slanderous claim that Pippin was secretly betrothed to Goldberry at > > > the time of the War of the Ring is yet another lie
> > Sheer nonsense of course. Pippin was a Took; that is to say, > > pure Fallowhide. They were "taller and slimmer than the others; > > they were LOVERS OF TREES...." [emphasis mine]
> > Now ask yourself where Fimbrethil and the other Entwives really > > ran off too?
> If you're right, I think we've found out who is TOLKIEN's authorial > self-insertion. (We had previously thought it was Treebeard, because > TOLKIEN was probably a tree. A bristlecone pine, to be exact)
> Dr. Lustmolch still insists it was Gollum.
If you prick hobbits, do they not bleed? If you tickle them, do they not laugh? If you set fire to their hairy feet, do they not scream and run away across the field? And Gollum was in Miami at the time, learnng to dance the tango.
heng...@swirve.com wrote: > And Gollum was in Miami at the time, > learnng to dance the tango.
My sources put him in Buenos Aires, dancing with Evita.
After being caught _in flagrante delicto_ by her husbandman Juan Perón, Seamgol fled to the Falkland Islands where he tried to pass himself off as an Adelie penguin. Outraged Argentines pursuing him there brought about the war with Britain.
>> And Gollum was in Miami at the time, >> learnng to dance the tango.
> My sources put him in Buenos Aires, dancing with Evita.
> After being caught _in flagrante delicto_ by her husbandman Juan Perón, > Seamgol fled to the Falkland Islands where he tried to pass himself > off as an Adelie penguin. Outraged Argentines pursuing him there > brought about the war with Britain.
Seamgol was Gollum's son with an Argentine woman of Irish hobbit descent - Seanita.
Oh, my God. Seanita, how could you? And not only that; my reserach informs me that they had a daughter who became the ancestress of the Argentine general and junta leader Reynaldo Bignone; his family name was a corruption of the boastful by-name "Big One".